Now C3 College is off and running- at two Campuses – I have time to write again. (I still don’t have time to source cool images so the sunrise is just a photo I love )
This one’s a little different – see if you like it.
So a few weeks ago I went to hear a Biblical Scholar John Barclay speak. In the midst of many things that he said he threw out a comment about something that has been running around in my head ever since.
As part of his research John Barclay is looking at poverty and giving in first century Palestine. Here is the Pam paraphrase of what he said and what has so challenged me.
“What if Biblical giving was never supposed to be one way – what if our whole concept of giving with no strings attached, without expecting anything back, is actually just a modern western construct?”
Now before you do what I did – and have your brain scream at you because we have always been told that the right thing to do is just to give to people and not expect to receive – consider these thoughts
- Is giving without expecting to receive a position of arrogance because we take a high position of – I am the person in plenty – and I will give to a person in need – and there is nothing they can do for me
- Isn’t true community actually about giving and receiving – about a co-dependence that is healthy and strong.
- Isn’t humility able to say – right now I give to you this gift of time, money, dinner, flowers etc but I know I will one day, and it may be tomorrow, I will need help from you.
Surely real community must go both ways.
As a person who has found it hard at times to ask for help, I am deeply challenged by these thoughts. I know that many of you who are in leadership roles probably are the same. In some ways, particularly in western culture, we celebrate people who don’t need help – we all love low maintenance friends.
However, what I think is not bothering people – or getting on with it – may in fact turn out to be arrogance and unhealthy independence.
Also isn’t there also the joy of giving that means we always receive and shouldn’t we just acknowledge it.
In times of tragedy or crisis – we all find it easier to receive. However, what if we lived everyday life in a flow of giving and receiving – and not just with family or those we live with ?
I wonder if that is what it means to be the body of Christ ?
Still thinking it through so love to hear your thoughts.
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Hi Pam, amazing you would write about this right now. I feel that God has been speaking to me about this very thing in this past week. There are lots of people (myself included) who are great givers but not very good receivers. It’s not about being too proud, it’s that we just don’t want to bother anyone or put anyone to any trouble (as you say, unhealthy independence). But I’ve realised that being a giver only and not a receiver leads to isolation and that is not God’s way so I agree wholeheartedly that God wants us to be givers and receivers (from Him and others). Thanks for a very timely post. Xxx
By not accepting what you can receive by those around us or in society could be a devaluing of those people and yourself. In our western society anything that makes us uncomfortable we avoid. We should be giving and expecting and we know that God answers or gives back in many ways that is why in western culture we miss it often as our thinking is box like. To be open hearted is to die to self and receive no matter how humbling. I work with the most vulnerable, I give to them daily but what I receive back is unconditional and it’s humbling.
I don’t know if it is just about giving and receiving or if it is much more the way you go about it? I feel uncomfortable giving and expecting a return. It’s good for me to be able to give unconditionally. But for the one who receives it may not be such a blessed gift if one is unable to return the favour, you then just are re affirned that you are poor and in need of someone else’s support to make do in life, it can lower your feeling of self worth and esteem. In my experience when I worked in the Roma community, relationship is everything. A gift can only really be received/ appreciated if one knows the heart of the giver, that is what makes it valueble. And when you know the heart, you know what you can do in return, sometimes it is good to simply receive, sometimes a hug will do, sometimes a tear of emotion is enough and sometimes you know you the other would be blessed by dinner or giving them your time or the knowledge you are there when the other needs it. Give the other room to do something in return and when you give, do it out of a relationship/feeling of equality. These are my initial thoughts about it :-). It’s a very good thing to talk and think about, thanks Pam!